Don’t Dismiss Your Kid’s Clumsiness

Whether it’s learning how to crawl, taking those first few unsteady steps, or learning how to hold a pencil, the process of learning motor skills during childhood takes a while, and also comes with a lot of faltering steps. For a number of children, learning these skills can take a much longer time—a delay that, if unaddressed, can have a number of long-term effects on their social, emotional and physical well-being.

In the beginning, this delay in motor skills can show up as clumsiness, but as a number of experts are starting to understand, the effects can have an impact on various aspects of a child’s life.

Developmental coordination disorder makes it hard to learn motor skills 

Developmental coordination disorder, which is sometimes called dyspraxia, is a neurodevelopmental disorder that makes it hard to learn motor skills, such as tying a shoe, writing with a pencil or learning new movements. Approximately five percent of children have the disorder, and although it doesn’t go away, it can be helped with practice.

“Developmental coordination disorder, in some ways, is like a motor version of executive dysfunction,” says Andrew Kahn, a licensed psychologist and behavior expert for the organization Understood, which offers support for individuals with learning differences. Executive function is the cognitive ability to plan, prioritize and execute goals. With developmental coordination disorder, a person has trouble planning and executing motions, which can result in clumsiness and difficulties with learning new types of movements.

Untreated developmental coordination disorder can lead to long-term effects 

If left untreated, developmental coordination disorder can lead to other challenges, whether it’s a child avoiding certain activities, such as playing sports or using a pencil to write, because they are struggling, or a loss in self-esteem, which can cause its own issues.

“With conditions like developmental coordination disorder, the longer they go untreated, the more challenges we see,” Kahn says. In his experience working with kids, he’s seen a pattern of “When I can’t, I am eventually going to tell you ‘I won’t,’ and I’m going to act out, to avoid doing things that are hard for me,” Kahn said.

Whether they’re refusing to do their homework due to embarrassment over their inability to hold a pencil, or avoiding the playground because of their clumsiness, a child’s developmental coordination disorder can impact their physical and mental well-being in a number of different ways.

Interventions are multi-faceted 

When it comes to helping a child with developmental coordination disorder, there are a number of different options. As Kahn explains, there are a couple of major approaches that can be helpful for a child struggling to learn certain motor skills.

The first major approach is to help them learn the physical skills they are struggling with, whether it’s practicing gripping a pencil, or learning how to tie a shoe. “We do physical breakdowns of tasks, that we train over and over, for tasks of daily living,” Kahn says. This is usually done under the guidance of an occupational therapist, who is experienced at finding ways of helping a child learn these skills.

The second major approach is to find ways of altering the environment to better fit their skills and needs. “It’s about finding goodness-of-fit for the individual,” Kahn says. An example might be letting them type their assignments, rather than writing with a pencil, or letting them figure out a physical activity that fits their own skills. “A kid that might not be coordinated for a ball sport may go out for cross country,” Kahn says. “That can have huge self-esteem benefits.”

How to get support for your child 

If your child is struggling to learn certain skills, whether it’s walking, feeding themself or holding a pencil, the first step is to bring it up with either their pediatrician or the school, as they will be able to refer them to the right services, such as occupational or physical therapy.

As Kahn notes, getting your child the right support may require advocacy. “Pediatricians are overworked, under-supported and underpaid, and they have to see so many kids and families per day that the tendency is to say, give it time, let it be, and we’ll see in time if they need something,” Kahn says. “The reality is, if your child is showing distress from the differences in what they can do, and what their peers can do, that is a big trigger, because that distress is going to lead to behavior and emotional issues. We want to prevent that. I always say to parents, you are the first and best expert in your child. When you have a confident feeling, advocate strongly and kindly, and push for that assessment.”