“When I remember why we were given such a deadline, it becomes easy to breathe and life is more fun.” Maria Kolesnikova gave BBC her first interview after she was imprisoned for 11 years

During the year I have been in five cells. Now the camera is very small – 2.5 by 3.5 meters. I always wake up at 6 am light and cheerful. I take a “shower” by heating the water in a basin (we go to the shower once a week). After checking at 8 am, I learn English and German – the most productive time. Then I walk. In a prison yard three by three meters I manage to run and do exercises. I have breakfast, I clean the cell. If there is no meeting with lawyers or interrogations, then I read and write. After lunch, I work for three hours on a criminal case, write texts and letters. At 17 o’clock I have supper and write again – about 200 letters are issued a month. Watching the news – hours-long “five-minute hate” like George Orwell’s. At 21 o’clock evening “shower” with a boiler, a book. Healthy sound sleep from 10 pm to 6 pm. I haven’t slept that much for many years.

Am I thrilled that I was given 11 years? No. But when I remember why we were given such terms, it becomes easy to breathe, and life is more fun. The regime is shifting onto us what it is itself to blame – the real one, with the aim of seizing power, was committed by Lukashenka. An absurd accusation was brought against us because we were brave and honest, we wanted positive changes. I’m not surprised that this is a crime for the regime.

When I was detained in September 2020, I knew that if they didn’t kill me, they would jail me. All year they did everything to make me feel sorry. A year in hot and cold cells, without air, without light, without people … Prison is a disgusting place, but here I feel free and happy. People who love me give incredible strength. Now I am going through a difficult path together with my people. I regret that Belarusians are scared that we are not free, and I regret those who commit monstrous deeds. Belarusians, you have not become worse from the fact that you no longer go out on the avenues with our flag. You have not become weaker because you fear for your life and freedom. You have nothing to blame yourself and each other for. You have not lost, you have not resigned, you are still incredible.

This is a rough retelling interview Maria Kolesnikova, which she gave to the Moscow correspondent of the BBC Sarah Rainsford. Quotes are not necessarily verbatim.

Cover photo: Ramil Nasibulin / BelTA / AFP / Scanpix / LETA

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